Grandpa’s Man Rules
First & foremost: Men are not mind readers.
Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
Sunday sports are like the full moon or the changing of the tides; let it be.
Crying is blackmail.
Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: subtle hints to not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it.
“Yes” and “No” are perfectly acceptable, complete answers to most every question.
Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In facts, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
If you think you are fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.
Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
If we ask you what is wrong and you say “nothing”, we will act like nothing’s wrong. We know you’re lying but it’s not worth the hassle.
I am in shape. Round is a shape.
Need some more humor? Go HERE.